Hey guys!! So I've been feeling a bit guilty the last few days. I don't necessarily think it's a completely rational guilt, and Cline says it's Satan trying to stir up drama and take away some of my joy this Christmas season. But it's there, nonetheless, and it's sparked a couple of interesting discussions with Kimberly over at The Tinneys, who suggested I blog about it. So here it is.
I have really been into the Christmas "stuff" this year. You know, the decorating, the present buying, the cookie-parties, the pictures... I'm loving it all! I think that I'm probably more excited than usual this year because Christa is at a really fun age for all of the festivities, and she can at least point to the trees, even if she doesn't understand why we put them up. (Actually, come to think of it, *I* don't know the reason we put them up. Anybody??) At any rate, I didn't mind when the Christmas decorations went up right after Halloween, and even felt a little behind when I didn't have mine out by Thanksgiving. I've had fun making lists and shopping, and I'm almost done, but I find excuses to go to the mall anyway, because I like to see people out and about this time of year. In the midst of all this excitement and decorating, I have tried to make an honest effort to not go overboard buying things for Christa. We are blessed with a lot of family around who will buy her a good many toys, and I want to enjoy my part without teaching her that the purpose of Christmas is opening gifts for two days straight. I think I did OK. I ordered her a bookshelf with toy bins, and let's face it - that's really for me more than it's for her :) I did a little all-night shopping on Black Friday, where I picked up a Little People dollhouse, a book to go in her bookshelf, and a Mr. Potatohead set that was on a good sale. I "impulse-bought" her a Christmas outfit on sale at Gymboree, and later an Elmo DVD to go in her stocking.
And that's it - I was done buying Christa's presents... until Cline and I went to Wal-Mart together where we saw a cute princess wand and an Elmo remote control that looks just like our real one. So we decided those would be gifts that Daddy picked out for her.
All was well until I was reading a blog the other day that was talking about whether or not "Santa" is an appropriate celebration of Christmas. This particular blog (Bring the Rain) always challenges me when I read the entries, and usually messes with my head a little bit, even though it's a great blog. The author stated that they do indeed have a Santa tradition in their home, but ONLY because their kids don't think of Christmas as a holiday about presents. Their children understand the true meaning, and if that were to ever change, so might their tradition.
And in came the guilt for buying the princess wand and Elmo remote along with a nagging worry that perhaps *I* am too excited about the presents this year.
Do I think I have an extravagant number of gifts for Christa?? No. I don't. Well, maybe I do compared to the kids in Africa or something. But by American standards, I'd guess I'm pretty average. I mean, it's not like I went out and bought her a Wii. It's a few plastic toys that will probably get lost or broken before she's old enough to realize she has them. Do I think it's the worst thing in the world to be excited about my daughter's first Christmas that she can help open presents and show excitement about them?? No - I agree with Cline that Satan is probably trying to steal some of my joy and discourage me from reading a blog that gives me good ideas about how to instill Christian principles into my daughter's life. But does Christa really NEED the princess wand and Elmo remote?? No, she doesn't. And I'm sure there are other kids out there who would appreciate those items a lot, who won't be getting lots of things from their grandparents.
So I am a little torn. Do I keep these little things, knowing that none of them are very expensive, and that I'm analyzing this way too much? Do I pick a couple of her gifts and return them or toss them in the nearest Toys for Tots bin? Or, do I order her the Little People Nativity in addition to the things I've already gotten her and call it a day?? (It's hard to find and currently available and ON SALE until Dec. 10 at the Fisher Price website for those of you who may be interested :)
I haven't come to any final conclusions (and would appreciate your thoughts), but I have definitely been motivated to start talking about the Christmas story more with Christa at the very least. We've started reading a pop-up nativity book together that she got for Christmas last year, and she seems to enjoy that. Kimberly shared with me a tradition they do in their house to teach their kids about Christmas. They don't put baby Jesus in their nativity until Christmas morning. I thought that was a really neat idea. A friend of hers limits their number of presents to three per child, to represent the three gifts the Wise men brought to Jesus. That is appealing to me in many ways. The pastor at church on Sunday suggested that we read the Christmas story directly from the bible every day from now until Christmas. I like that idea, too. So, what traditions do you all have in your families that demonstrate why we celebrate Christmas? (I reserve the right to steal any and all good ideas :)
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6 comments:
I don't think you should be feeling guilty, and I don't think you need to get rid of any of the things you've bought for Christa. We've been in the "fun" years a few years now, and the excitement and joy that you see in your child's face is a blessing. Some of my favorite and most "spiritual"(for lack of a better word) moments have been when I was watching my kiddos enjoy the season(secular and regligious), and realizing just how much God must love me to share them with me. A smile on your child's face is sometimes just a powerful as a sermon preached by the best preacher in the world.
But I do also agree that it's hard not to get focused on all the "stuff". One of our favorite Christmas books around here is My Merry Christmas And the real reason for Christmas joy. It's really great for young children(and me, too!) to explain why we do some of the things we do at Christmas time. Good luck!
We want Little People, it didnt show up on sale for me... My favorite thing about Christmas is the nativity scene... so Cal will be ultra exposed to that!
Jess, shes 1, enjoy it, let her enjoy it! Don't stress. I think anyone who reads this blog know that you and Cline will raise your child to know the word of God! We also know that you will teach her to give to others. Enjoy the fun parts and praise Him for all you are able to do with Christa!
I have a cool poem at school about the holidays from a child's perspective. I'll post it in the morning. Email me if I forget... also I need your address for Christmas cards!
Jessica,
It is so funny that you posted this because I just read that same post on Bring the Rain and was feeling the same guilt. I think that as long as we are constantly talking about the real reason for the season with our children, then there is nothing wrong with indulging them a little. There is nothing better than watching them enjoy the "magic!" One other thing to remember is that Angie's twins are six years old, so they have a much better understanding of Christmas. And, like Bridget and Nancy said, it is clear that you will raise Christa to be a good Christian. I have no doubt that she will grow to be a giving and kind adult.
I have a prayer request for everyone...
My sister's boyfriend's dad (aka her future father-in-law) is having major surgery tomorrow (Wednesday) to remove a meningioma. The extremely delicate surgery will take place a Johns Hopkins. Please keep him and his family in your prayers during this very difficult time.
Kelly
I just went back to the Fisher Price Website, and it didn't show up on sale today. I could swear it was on sale for $10 off yesterday. Maybe the dates of the sale were wrong, or maybe I looked at so many sites that were more expensive, that I got confused. Sorry!
Thanks for the thoughts guys. I think I'm going to take your advice and just enjoy Christmas with my family.
Kelly, we will definitely be praying for your sister's future father-in-law.
Hey Jessica,
First, you and your head are overanalyzing. Now personally, overanalyzing has saved me from bad decisions, but it doesn't sound like you're any where close to that here. If you really think about it, for kids, the only time presents enter the scene (at least for our family) was Christmas morning. Meanwhile, you have all of December to be talking about the true meaning of Christmas, Christ's birth, opening advent calendars (this could be a good way to reinforce the religious meaning of the holidays depending on the one you get), lighting advent candles at dinner, going to church, etc. I think when she looks back, Christa will remember more of the season and celebration surrounding the birth of Christ than the 5 minutes that it took to rip open presents. I say enjoy the season. And if you do feel comfortable financially and otherwise, you could give back to the community. My cousin and I dressed up as Santa last year with about 150 other Santas who are honestly more about having fun and drinking later at the bars while in costume, gathered on the mall (in D.C.), and passed out small goodie bags and some bigger presents to all the children we met. I'm not saying that you'll have this sort of occasion, but you could always wrap some small presents with Christa perhaps next year and let her know you're giving them to other kids because [insert your own thoughts here].
As for the Christmas tree -- like all great things, this one has roots in Germany! (Just kidding... kind of...). The Germans started this one and often decorated it with mostly food (seriously, like apples, pretzels, nuts, etc.) There are plenty of legends regarding the tree too. For instance, some say Martin Luther saw stars through the branches of a tree on a walk home one night and got the idea to put candles, tinsel and stars on trees in his home.
But, heavens to murgatroyd, I think the roots are actually pagan, as they erected trees for the Winter Solstice. Then, there is also the Yule Log tradition (a lovely pagan tradition turned Christmassy that is celebrated at William & Mary too), during which a yule log is carried through a crowd. Each person holds a piece of holly and first brushes it on the log and then burns it in a fire, symbolizing a purification from all harm and bad nasties of the previous year. Sometimes, a yule log burning in one's fire place was also thought to keep away the devil. Anyhow, there are tons of things...
but...
I think at the end of the day, regardless of where our traditions originate, the lesson is to celebrate based on your own beliefs, whether it is with the traditions you already have or the traditions you're currently inventing. Have fun and be clear in your own mind about what you want to convey to Christa, keeping in mind she's only 1, and that you're allowed to celebrate whatever you like, including yourself, your husband, your daughter, your family, your friends, AND Christ, all at the same time.
Jessica, I know that in the midst of the christmas chaos it can seem that we all forget the real meaning behind Christmas. No, I don't think you went overboard and I would not feel quilty about being excited about her opening gifts. You are doing a wonderful job teaching your child about God and that is the lesson and memory that she will hold dear in the future. Of course, with every holiday, such as Easter and Christmas other characters seem to come forth. In our home we incorporate the two; religion and other traditions. As for the gifts, we too are excited about seeing our Kaitlyn's face as she is at an age when things are magical and exciting. Besides this is usually the time that we take the opportunity to buy her the toys and clothing that she will use for the rest of the year. As for Cara we did not go overboard in gifts since she does not understand the excitement of the season...she got clothing and one toy. As they get older I plan on incorporating helping others more during this time of year and doing extra things to make them understand the need of others around them. Don't forget that Santa Claus will only last a certain amount of years, but Christ will be forever. So enjoy your child's face lighten up as they open a gift from Santa Claus. I certainly do every year and thankful to God that I am able to experience and provide that for my children.
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